NFL

Soooooo Not Ready

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Every year it’s the “ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL???” question that’s thrown around.

And I am SO not ready.

But I’m getting there.

Hubby and I were planning to go to the Mets game all along, on Gameday one for the NFL (though technically it DID start last Wednesday).

I had planned on writing this prior to going to the game today, but wasn’t in the mood to start up the computer (it was the Sunday morning after doing a 15 mile training run).  This is how lazy I am getting.

So we go to the baseball game.  But for good measure, I wore my Jets shirt.  You know, to be a good football fan.  Maybe THAT would get me in the mood to deal with things.

But then I managed to get bits and pieces of the game throughout the baseball game.  Funny, the stadium was practically empty, and the only time the crowd got roused up was when they posted updates on the Jets game.

Then when it was over, I was happy.  The Mets outcome was almost secondary.

My husband is a Seahawks fan.  We decided to head to a local bar to watch the game.

Our first stop was a local British pub that is a Mets-friendly bar, and the bartender told us that every Sunday the NHL package shows all games.  Till we realized that it was a Panthers bar.  Moving right along, we find another bar that has only ONE television on the Seahawks/Cardinals game.

That about did it.

So if I wasn’t ready for football yet, I am now.  All in all, the sports day could have been better for me.  The Mets could have won, and my husband could have gone home happy instead of disappointed that the Seahawks couldn’t win.

But it was good to see that I could turn it on in a flash.   I mean, it’s one game a week.  I can handle that.  I think.

The Holy Sheepshit and Balls Videocast: Tim Tebow Is a Jet (And Others)

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Hellloooooo everyone, and thank you for your patience.  I’d blown off my first v-log for over a week, and I have two parts to the Holy Sheepshit and Balls video of the week.

Topics: My Nolan Ryan interview with the lovely folks at KinersKorner.com (The Kult of Mets Personalities podcast) was a Holy Sheepshit and Balls moment for me.  Please go the interview and listen for yourself!

Tim Tebow is a Jet.  I try to wrap my head around it.  And I can’t.  But I applaud Mark Sanchez for taking the high road for a guy who can potentially take his job.

Watch and pass around…and enjoy! (And here’s the link from YouTube)

Dubya Te(bow) Eff? Jay! Ee! Tee! Ess!

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So, did I miss any news while I was out jogging today?

If I could wrap my head around WHY it happened, or WHY it is necessary, than maybe I could be supportive of it.  But…

Yeah, I don’t get it.

Earlier today, SNY’s Jets Blog did a very good recap of the pros and cons of bringing Tebow to the Jets.  It was very well done, but I can’t even say that I agreed with some of “pros.”

Tebow, a first-string QB who probably shouldn’t be, on a new team with another first-string QB?

Um.   Yeah.  Okay.

The Jets are enough of a media circus by themselves.  Do they really need the distraction of Tebow?

Look, I hear Tim Tebow is a really lovely guy.  Nice guy.  We all know that he’s a spiritual dude.  He’s worshiped in the Bible Belt.  I don’t think he’ll last six seconds in the New York media.

A few months ago, my friend Jon Presser from Rant Sports Jets blog discussed Mark Sanchez on my podcast, and we both agreed that warts and all, Sanchez is our guy. Sanchez, to me, had enough panache, charisma and balls to bring a title to the Jets, or at the very least be a big part of it.  I’ve been a Jets fan for a long time, but in my lifetime, I’m not entirely sure I could say that about anyone on the team in the past.

A few days ago, there was rumor that Peyton Manning would come to the Jets.  Manning, a living legend in Indianapolis and a likable dude somewhat, did not make a ton of sense to come to New York when he was up for grabs.  I mean, remember bringing Brett Favre here in 2008?  That totally backfired, right?  And Favre was a success, just as Manning was, prior to coming here.  Then the Jets gave Sanchez a new deal, and the point seemed moot.

I even told my cousin, a die hard Broncos fan, that I didn’t agree that Manning was a good fit there either.  My cousin, I should also mention, is a Tebow guy.  Now we have pissed off Broncos fans and REALLY pissed off Jets fans.

(Jon did a very good job, prior to the deal by the way, on why Tebow wouldn’t be a good fit on the Jets.  Basically, make everything present-tense and I could have written it myself.)

People can say what they want about Tebow.  The good stuff, the bad stuff, the polarizing personality, the overratedness, at the end of the day, he doesn’t make the team ANY better.  They are nowhere near closer to winning a championship without him than with him, if that makes any sense.

And that’s why I want nothing to do with having on the team.  But I can’t do much about it.  In a few days, we’ll be seeing a press conference, and I’ll just have to sit and smack my head repeatedly about yet the next dumb move the Jets are going to make.

My Twitter buddy Swirlywand had this to say on the Gal for all Seasons Facebook page:

“Picture it…Opening Sunday…Mark throws 3 incomplete passes and Tebow Maniacs are going to be Tebowing in the stands and chanting Tebow’s name. I’m trying to be supportive (because) this is MY TEAM DARN IT….but I am sure it’s going to split the locker room as much as it’s splitting fans.”

That’s about it in a nutshell for me.  WTF, J-E-T-S?  Unless they are going to say PSYCH in a few days and trade him for somebody else…this makes ZERO logistical sense.

The Holy Sheepshit and Balls Moment of the Week

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Last week, I made my foray into video blogging by posting my reactions at the Garden following a dramatic Rangers’ OT win over the Islanders last weekend.

I hated it.  I hated my facial expressions, and my voice.  But hey, I believe that practice does indeed make perfect, and overcoming one’s fears is critical to personal development.

For those of you who follow me on Twitter, I have coined the phrase “Holy Sheepshit and Balls” for an exciting moment or something unbelievable in sports.  Well, maybe not coined the phrase, but I’m certainly identified with it.

Without further ado, I will be making a short video each week on my “Holy Sheepshit and Balls Moment of the Week.”  It will be very egocentric, usually having to do with my teams, but can include some other sports items that people are talking about that I’ve taken notice.

So consider yourself warned!  This will probably go up Sunday night for Monday morning’s release.

Please hold your applause to the end.

Oh and you can follow my YouTube Channel here.

And here is the awful first video I did.

Just Pey No

New York Jets, NFL, , , , One comment

I know it’s been like a week since Peyton Manning and the Indianapolis Colts announced they have agreed that after a storied career with the franchise, Manning would no longer be a Colt.  It’s sad, since he’s been very successful, but he’s also been what we call “hurt” and at the end of the day, we know this is a business.

Yet, I had people asking me to weigh in on it.  I thought since I’ve said it on Twitter that my position is clear on the idea of Peyton Manning on the Jets.  I mean, I am a Jets fan first, but there are players who deserve my respect, and I always respected the shit out of Peyton.  Thought it was a shame that if his career were to end, it would be this way and not via a retirement road show like he deserves.  That’s about the extent of it.

Meaning, don’t even bother asking me if I want him on my team.  The short answer is no.

The long answer – are you fucking crazy? Why the hell would he be a good fit for the Jets AT ALL in this lifetime?  Like, I don’t know why this is even a discussion.  Hell-to-the-NO is more like it for the long answer.

Besides, this was written on Friday afternoon, and by Friday evening, it was announced that the Jets had extended Mark Sanchez with a three-year deal.  So a lot of this is moot now.

Yet, I had some people try to argue with me why it would be a good idea for Peyton Manning to be a Jet.  I listened, since I like to think of myself as a compassionate version of Mike Francesa (ok, that’s a bad example, since I’m comparing myself to a know-nothing blowhard radio guy), but I don’t want to be abrupt or condescending.  If someone brings up a good point to me, I’ll acknowledge it but tell people how I feel afterwards.

Someone suggested to me that Peyton could help the Jets bring home a Super Bowl.  And if I eat broccoli today, I could take a dump tomorrow.  Look, maybe five years ago Peyton could win a Super Bowl in New York.  With his injury history and obvious deterioration, it’s not the best idea, especially when we already have Sanchez here.  Hiccups and all, Sanchez is our guy, as I discussed with Jon Presser on my podcast a few weeks ago.  Even Eli Manning has two Super Bowl titles, and he led the league in interceptions not more than two years ago!

I know Peyton Manning will end up somewhere.  But if anyone merely suggests that he could cure what ills the New York Jets at this point, they’re sorely mistaken.  Like, didn’t we just go through that mess with Brett Far-ver-uh in 2008?

Here’s where I think Peyton would be a good fit:

1.) Seattle Seahawks

2.) Miami Dolphins

3.) ….Yeah, that’s about it.

I know it’s a longshot, but you come here for my opinion, and I’m gonna give it to you.  I like and respect Peyton Manning, but to suggest he could do better or be better than what we have is a massive overstatement.  Sanchez is our guy and the sooner we realize that, the better off we’ll all be (and the Jets took care of that for us today).  But, you know, best of luck to Peyton on his job search.  He’ll be employed in no time.

Plus, I wouldn’t want that Sausage Race looking mother fucker on my team anyway.

 

Uncanny resemblance, right?

Take Those Rings And Shove ‘Em

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There’s a curious thing happening here in New York City.

The Rangers are playing some stellar hockey, to the extent that it’s time to think about playoffs, and I mean *deep* into the playoffs.

Then there’s the Jeremy Lin phenomenon on the Knicks, where it’s all anyone is talking about.  Even lay people who aren’t into basketball (like yours truly) have been jumping on the #LINning tweet hash tags and wondering what this kid can’t seem to do.

The Rangers are getting their due respect.  Henrik Lundqvist is finally coming into his own as an elite goaltender, Ryan Callahan is proving to everyone why he was named Captain of the team and these guys would take a bullet for one of their own teammates.  The Knicks are making their fans believers again, to the extent that people who had given up on them a long time ago are coming around again.

That’s not to say everyone is thrilled with these happenings.  I’m sure Devils, Isles and Flyers fans don’t care much about how the Rangers are performing (or Bruins fans, for that matter).  Is anyone outside of New York following Jeremy Lin-sanity?

So then when anyone brings up the fact that Henrik Lundqvist is a frontrunner for the Hart, Vezina and any trophy that can be anointed to any hockey player not a defenseman, or that anyone is a great player in New York…those who don’t care?  Those who like New York sports?

“How many rings does Henrik have again?”

“Has Jeremy Lin won any championships?”

Yes, folks, there are those people who want to piss all over the success of individual players by pointing out their shortcomings in the championship arena.

I could go the shorthand route and say, “Well it’s a team sport and any rings earned is based on team performance.”

But it’s something that any fan goes straight to, regardless of sport.  I mean, has everyone turned in Yankees fans to use their team’s overall success to diminish the greatness of a few individual players?

Look at the Devils’ Martin Brodeur.  Uncle Daddy Fatso has won three Cups under my watch and he was the star goaltender of those teams.  Yet, those teams won as a UNIT with the likes of Scott Stevens and Ken Daneyko leading the way.  Without those players, I doubt you get to fully appreciate how good Brodeur was for those teams.  And yet, when we all point and laugh at Marty, any of their Devils fans are all, “Well, how many Cups has Henrik won?”

Are you FUCKING SERIOUS?

Then there’s the whole Eli Manning ballwashing that has occurred.  Not to diminish any of his accomplishments because I’ll even admit that he has shown the capacity to really come through for his team when they need him most.  Yet, a few months ago, weren’t his fanbase and the local media throwing him under the bus for…well…whatever reason?  Look, mad respect for him…but does he win those rings with any other team?  Maybe not.

But then, does that mean he’s one of the best?  That remains to be seen.  But then we can look at the careers of Jim Kelly or Dan Marino and see that sometimes, life isn’t fair in sports.  Some of the best QBs haven’t won ONE ring, let alone two. Then Tom Brady is known for his failures to lead his team to two Super Bowl title when he already has earned THREE with the New England Patriots.

Football is strange though, because there are smaller margins of error in a season, and most games are more critical because there are fewer to play.

Basketball also has those great players who never won a championship.  I was a fan back in the day when John Stockton and Karl Malone were the core unit of the Utah Jazz.  They’re both Hall of Fame players, and don’t have a ring to their accomplishments.  Does this mean they were horrible players?  True, they’re not Michael Jordans, but even Dirk Nowitzki won a championship last year with the Dallas Mavericks, when the Miami Heat were all but anointed champions before a game was even played.

And don’t get me started on baseball.  I live in New York City, where I have to bear witness to the Yankee ballwashing that goes on a daily basis, 162 games a year, and 365 days a year when it’s all anyone harps on.  Forget the “Miracle” 1969 Mets.  Forget the Amazin’ 1986 Mets that we still haven’t gotten over.  It’s Derek Jeter – BEST SHORTSTOP EVAH according to their fans and local media.  How about Mariano Rivera?  All-time saves leader and has five rings.  But look at the teams they played on.  Wouldn’t it stand to reason that those teams won because of the TEAMS and not because of one or two players?  Look at the Jazz again.  If it were up to one or two players, championships would be easier to come by.  Even the 1980s Mets were faltered because of the game of chance.

Which is all some championship seasons are.  Chance.

But then, look at the Rangers.  If they win the Stanley Cup this year, IF Henrik Lundqvist wins the Vezina or Hart (or that may be one of his teammates, Marian Gaborik), IF IF IF IF…

When someone talks about how great of a season and improbable run as Henrik Lundqvist has had, they’ll say, “Yeah…but he doesn’t THREE CUPS.”

To that, I only have one response.

TAKE THOSE RINGS AND SHOVE ‘EM STRAIGHT UP YOUR ASS KID!!!

To take a team accomplishment and make it into an individual accomplishment defeats the purpose of sports.  But hey, it’s a game of one-upmanship for fans to participate in.  But it’s a flawed argument and I hope that “real” fans understand the difference.

What Do I Know? I’m Just A Girl

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I am a woman.

I am a woman and I happen to be a sports fan.  A “Gal For All Seasons,” as you can see.  I spend most of my year following sports, and living and dying by what my teams do.

Yes, Virginia, women CAN be sports fans.  Sports nuts, if you will.  Yet, it’s clear that sports networks, agencies and leagues haven’t the first clue about how to market, treat or respect female fans.

I don’t begrudge women who don’t like sports.  As a post-feminist era, erm, feminist, I would be a hypocrite if I thought women who didn’t like sports were some sort of aberration.  But I hate when women act the “shrew” if their husbands like sports.  Like Stacey Tavor Merwin, who famously wrote for Huffington Post on how she voted that her first wedding anniversary took precedence over the Super Bowl.  When her husband works in sports photography for his livelihood.  After he brought up that there may be conflicts with the date in the future with the day SHE chose they get married.

As Metschick mentioned on Twitter, this is the same type of person who would purposely get pregnant in three months from now exactly and schedule a C-section for Super Bowl weekend JUST so her husband would not be able to watch it.  It’s fine if they agreed they wanted to make their anniversary special.  Yet, when you blast it on Huffington Post and talk about sacrifices you make over the year, like walking the dog (something you’re supposed to do) and giving your husband a massage (really? I bet that only happened once), sorry if I find this a little insincere and emasculating for your husband.

Look, women (or men) have every right to either vote their anniversary a higher precedence…if perhaps BOTH parties don’t care about football (especially if you’ve married Frasier Crane).  But it’s women like her that make every single woman who chooses not to like or watch sports look bad.   You don’t like the Super Bowl?  Fine.  But don’t be a shrew who makes her husband, who enjoys the contest, miss it simply because you’re threatened by a FOOTBALL GAME.

Yet, just when I think feminism can’t be set back any further, it gets worse.  Much worse.

CBS Sports, in their infinite wisdom, announces their big launch of a new app called…

Baseball Boyfriend?

Womp, womp, womp.

Just to make sure that women ONLY watch sports because the players are hot or hoping that some day they too can become a Baseball Wife (or Baseball Ex-Wife), CBS Sports puts up this insulting website for women to create female-friendly “Fantasy teams.”  Items of note include: hottest player, and then you can “dump” him.  I mean, how cool is that?? /sarcasm

One of the fringe benefits of being a female sports fan, I can attest to, is being able to watch the games and WATCH THE GAMES, if you know what I mean.  My friend @hildachester and I talk about Chris Capuano now that he’ll be on the Dodgers next year.  I drool over Henrik Lundqvist.  The women I know who also do that are second to none in their hockey knowledge.  I have dubbed catcher Brian Schneider as “Two Scoops,” in deference to his two scoops of butter pecan butt.  But ask people like me and Hilda about baseball and we’ll keep up with the best of them.   Women like us could teach some men a thing or two about baseball.

But sites like these clearly miss the mark in essentially thinking that ALL women are ONLY into these sports because men are hot.  I mean, I guess Baseball Boyfriend is way catchier than say, “Baseball Guys I Want To Boink.”

The irony is that women like myself and Hilda, as examples, is that we LOVE the game.  We may joke about “fantasy teams,” but the reality is, women like us keep up with the best of them by actually having real fantasy teams that we agonize over starting certain players or pitchers over one another.

Please don’t insult our intelligence AND tastes.

I get that it’s supposed to be a fantasy baseball primer for women…but this is seriously offensive to any woman who has ever rooted for a team.  Especially for someone like me, since I’ve been a baseball fan since I was seven and know nothing else.

Just when I thought it couldn’t get worse…I find out something else.  Just when I think that women’s standing in sports are growing by leaps and bounds (after all, we do represent 45% of the fan population)…ESPN launches a place to complain about female commentators.  Yes, you read that right.  JUST FEMALE COMMENTATORS.

My response?  I take it they’ve never listened to Tim McCarver.  Perhaps they were unfamiliar with the old site FireJoeMorgan too.  And maybe they haven’t heard Jon Miller say “Bel-TRAN” or “Bel-TRAY” one too many times on a Sunday.  **SMH** in the parlance of our times.

Here I thought that maybe things were getting better for female fans or women who work in sports media just slightly.  With the advent of sites like Aerys Sports and espnW (yes I see the irony in ESPN starting a female commentator blasting forum), I thought that maybe showcasing women in a positive sports light would essentially go mainstream.  Guess not.

I can’t even say that I am angry.  I am sad.  Sad that women still get delegated to the cleanup work and still get the most abuse on sports forums when they’re knowledgeable and fascinating and are just as passionate, if not more, than most male fans.  What’s worse?  The major sports media owners (CBS Sports is, well, CBS and ESPN is Disney, for crying out loud) actually AGREES and PROMOTES this behavior!  Sickening.

As Julie DiCaro from Aerys Sports and League of Her Own said succinctly, “Not a good day for women in sports today.”  No, my dear.  Not good at all.

They may not know how to promote to us, but I’ll tell you what: you’re going about it all wrong.  Try treating women sports fans like SPORTS FANS, and not people who need a “female-friendly” option or dumbing down.  It’s not becoming nor is it necessary.

I’m sure at the root of it all is a hope that women just don’t want to be fans anymore.  You’re not getting off that easy, bucko.  I’m not going anywhere.  You can still hear me bitch about this on my podcast tomorrow night and probably in future times.

Little Miss Sunshine: Super Bowl 46

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So there you have it, folks.  Another football season is complete, with the Super Bowl ending just around 10 pm EST yesterday.

As a Jets fan, I was joking around for the past two weeks that I was rooting for a meteor or an epicenter to form in Indianapolis.  The reality is, though, while watching the game, my hatred for the New England Patriots kind of surpassed anything that I’d ever felt.  I can’t say I was rooting for them to lose, but I felt I snickered more at their misery and mistakes more than anything else.   When the game was official, I knew that the Schadenfreude delight was now complete.

I had a Stan Marsh moment too at one point: I learned something on Super Bowl Sunday.

I learned that I was a football fan.  I watched the game, and I enjoyed it.  I’ve always said that football is the sport I care the least about, but I found the Super Bowl fun and entertaining, and I was able to eat bad carbs and get away with it.

This is the first Super Bowl that I’ve covered here at Gal For All Seasons, since I’ve only been writing since basically the beginning of football season in 2011.  So maybe I’ll incorporate this every year into the Super Bowl recap.

In the movie Little Miss Sunshine, Olive’s father, played by Greg Kinnear, is a pseudo-motivational speaker.  His philosophy is coined on taking the steps of being a “Winner.”  He starts off the movie by saying, “There are two people in this world: winners and losers.”  The same could be said about sports, obviously, and the Super Bowl is a one-and-done game.  So I’m channeling my inner Little Miss Sunshine today.  Some of the winners and losers may be obvious, but I’m going to have fun with it, as only Coop can do.

WINNER:  Tom Coughlin.

At the beginning of the game, I mentioned to the group I was watching with, that he looked like he aged about 30 years this season.  Talk about a year of ups and downs.  Now he’ll be enshrined in Giants history as one of the best there ever was.

WINNER:  Eli Manning.

This was a no-brainer.  I’ve said all along that I’ve felt that Manning is overrated.  I’ll probably get killed for this, but I still do (you can thank the chemistry of his offensive line for the win last night…not to discount his performance, as he came through when the team needed him most which is more than we can say for the other team).  That said, he’s finally gotten out of the shadow of Peyton…literally.  During this first matchup in 2008, all that was shown was Peyton watching his little brother.  They were in his HOME FIELD…and everyone mentioned that Peyton wasn’t shown once on the broadcast.

Manning may be overrated.  But he’s an overrated QB with two rings.  And will get the respect he deserves, singularly.

WINNER:  Victor Cruz.

I love this guy!  How can one not have fun watching him play?

LOSER:  Bill Belichick.

Cheaters NEVER win, Bill.  I also reacted to Belichick’s vision on screen the way Bluto did to seeing Kent Dorfman’s face on the screen in Animal House.  “AGGGHHHHHHH!”

WINNER: Wes Welker.

Welker has gotten a lot of heat for dropping a crucial pass that could have sealed the fate of the Pats.  He took the criticism, and the blame for it.  He took the high road.  He didn’t need to.  The reality is, it was a poor throw from Brady.  Skip Bayless argued that Brady is one of the most accurate passers of his generation…but it was Brady who made a poor throw to Welker.

At the end of the day, I go back to my original argument.  That this game was the Patriots to lose.  The Giants had absolutely no pressure on them.  And look what happened: they made a somewhat blah game exciting at the end, and they won.

LOSER:  Tom Brady.

BWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!

Okay.  I’m done.

BWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!

No seriously.  I’m done now.

LOSER:  Gisele Bündchen.

BWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!

I’m not a religious person.  But I really dislike when people use their power of prayer for trivialities in life, when there is legitimate suffering in the world.  Especially rich people who have everything.  And don’t get me started on Tim Tebow.  But Gisele’s email heard ’round the world: “Please pray for my Tommy.”  Could you get any more insincere than that?  Here are two people, each independently wealthy in their own right, “praying” for a Super Bowl win?  Get bent.

But it gets better.  Apparently, Gisele had some choice words for her Tommy’s teammates after the loss.  “My husband cannot [expletive deleted] throw the ball and catch the [expletive deleted] ball at the same time.”  I know Brady is one of the best there is, but come on…like he hasn’t choked the same exact fucking game away twice?

Gisele, you seem like an intelligent business woman.  But please keep your mouth shut about your husband’s profession.  It makes all women look bad.

LOSER:  This broad.

Speaking of making all women look bad, Stacey Tavor Merwin has set the feminist movement back at least 45 years by emasculating her husband to the extent that when they got married last year, her husband (who makes a livelihood of sports photography) mentioned that there will be a chance that the Super Bowl might fall on their anniversary.  So what does she do?  Create a hubbub reminiscent of Bridezillas.  And insist they go out on one of the biggest sports nights of the year…and writes about the wifely sacrifices SHE needs to make.  Like walking the dog.  Big fucking whoop.  It’s like the old Chris Rock bit that used to say, “I take care of my kids.”  Yeah, you want a cookie?  YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR KIDS.  And you’re supposed to take the dog out on walks. And if your husband wants to watch the Super Bowl, you could compromise and go out to dinner the night before…or have some kind of special weekend away. I know from being married, it’s about the other 364 days a year, not just that one day of the year.

Women like her need to get over themselves.

Read Kristine Reese’s post on that in The Green Room from Sunday.  Her take on it is better than anything I could ever say.

WINNER:  Womankind.

I was in a house watching the game with a ratio of 3 women: 1 man.  Take that, Ms. Merwin. (And her husband could have totally joined us)

WINNER:  Kelly Clarkson.

Clarkson nailed the Star Spangled Banner.  Some singers make the National Anthem more about “them” and their vocal styles, as opposed to making Francis Scott Key proud, with the way it’s supposed to be sung.

LOSER:  The vicious media.

Kelly Clarkson is a healthy role model for women everywhere.  Because she doesn’t weight 75 lbs is cause for vicious attacks on her body.  She’s healthy.  She looks phenomenal.  Leave it alone, the criticism gets old.

LOSER:  The Half-time Show.

I am a child of the ’80s.  I like dating myself to the extent that I can tell people, “I remember music BEFORE Madonna.”  Like her or not, Madonna helped change the face of music, she changed fashion, she changed the face of pop culture and she changed the face of women and sexual notions.  I was cautiously optimistic about her half-time show, as I’ve heard her shows are very detailed.

She started out strong, got bored in the middle and it ended okay.  But I felt like that episode of The Simpsons, where Homer was watching Bachman Turner Overdrive play and he kept yelling, “TAKIN’ CARE OF BUSINESS!! TAKIN’ CARE OF BUSINESS!!”  To which they said, well, that’s all the crowd wants to hear anyway…so they break into TCB, to which Homer yells out, “GET TO THE GOOD PART!!”

Yeah.  That was how I felt watching that.  While I know Madonna has evolved over the course of her career, let’s be fair: people want to hear the ’80s shit.  If she had stuck to that, I think it would have been a lot better.

LOSERS: Sore winners.

I am a Jets fan.  I probably weighed the pros and cons of this Super Bowl a few times.  I wasn’t going to root for anything, but the Patriots losing did make me smile a little.  The Jets had nothing to do with the games.  They haven’t even friggin played since New Year’s Day.  But sore winners still make it a point to bring up the Jets’ faults.  Again, what the fuck does that have to do with anything?  And most Jets fans were happy about how it turned out last night.  Those who feel the need to bring that up don’t deserve to be happy about their team’s win.  Fuck them and the white horse they rode in on.

WINNER: New York

My mom once pointed out to me that I have an unnatural hate towards all things Boston.  That’s not true.  I don’t dislike the Red Sox.  You know, that whole “enemy of my enemy is my friend” BS.  In 2004, I was pleased as punch when Boston knocked out the Yankees and then went on to win the World Series (mostly as a baseball historian).  But I never liked the town of Boston.  It aggravates me to the point that I just trash it when I’m there.  My mom tells me I have a New York City complex.  While that may be true, the reality is, Boston doesn’t make it any better by contributing to the whole “inferiority complex” thing.  Like Philly. I also have an unnatural hate towards all things New England.  Not lobster.  Or New England clam chowda.  But Connecticut: HATE.  Massachusetts:  Hate hate hate.  I’m sure if I visited Vermont or New Hampshire, I’d find a reason to hate them too.

So New England – Fuck you!  Take a cue from what it’s like to be from a REAL metropolis.

Podcast Predictions

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Last night was a monumental evening.  Well, for me anyway.  Two things happened.  One was I launched my official Gal For All Seasons podcast.  I didn’t know how I would feel about just talking to myself for a half hour, but I think it could have gone a lot worse.  Many thanks to NDB Media for producing the show.  Looking forward to working with you guys over there.

The other thing was that I actually made some Super Bowl predictions.  I don’t really care about the outcome — I won’t cry if the Patriots lose, but I usually root for AFC in the Bowl.  I didn’t last year (mostly because I hated the Steelers and really have a fangirl crush on Aaron Rodgers).  This year, for obvious reasons, I won’t be either.  But I’m not exactly rooting for the Giants either.  Getting all that out of the way, I have some predictions that I mentioned on the show.

One is that I think this will be a high scoring game.  I also think it’s Tom Brady’s game to lose.  If you think about it, the Giants are going into this game with absolutely no pressure.  They won in 2008, and they could very well win again, against a “superior” quarterback in Brady (blech).  If the Giants win, they’ve toppled over Goliath.  If the Patriots win, well, they beat a team that got by on luck.  It could go either way.  But I’m predicting a BIG time Brady choke.

Also predicted a big game from Victor Cruz.  Probably one of the few Giants whom I sincerely like.  How can I hate on a guy who relishes his Jerseyness?

I also predict that I’ll be eating a lot of carbs.  I’ll be fat and happy on the couch.  That’s something I know I’ll be getting right.

Most of all, enjoy yourselves and drink responsibly.  And that’s a view from The Coop!

All-Star Follies

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I haven’t been a fan of the MLB All-Star Game for a few years.  I think my tipping point was in 2006.  I remember reading some quotes from some players on the Houston Astros who were like, “I won’t be losing any sleep if the NL loses, ha ha.”  Yeah.  My ass.  That’s what happens when you make something that is a glorified exhibition game between players whose team more than likely won’t be making the playoffs to determine home field advantage for a game that the All-Star game has no bearing on.  If you can follow that circular reasoning.

Anyway, I’d had enough of the game when I saw Miguel Cabrera Dorn an easily playable ball in the 9th inning when the NL was leading, and Trevor Hoffman successfully blew the save and the NL went on to lose.  Hoffman’s team had made the playoffs later that season; Cabrera’s team had no shot.  It didn’t matter.  There is a disconnect between what the game actually means in the long run to what the players are actually playing for.

Well, fuck that noise.   I’d had enough of the All-Star Shit Show.  And it’s not much different in the other sports I follow.

My dad once told me of an NHL All-Star Game that one of the teams won by a margin of like 2-1.  It sounded like a great game.  There was a level of competitiveness that the players had and maybe a sense of pride.  You don’t really see that anymore.  It’s now more of a “I can score more goals that you can.”  It’s a combination of “I don’t want to deface this property” or Roger Dorn-ism that these players are voted in.  It’s supposed to be an “honor,” but at the end of it, all it becomes is a shit show.

Like the NHL All-Star Game.  I didn’t know if I should have been happy that Marian Gaborik was the MVP…or upset that he owned our Henrik Lundqvist, among others.  I have to say, I was talking about that whole players choosing their own teammates thing, it’s basically Fantasy Hockey.  On one hand, it’s a novelty, and at the end of the day, it’s just an exhibition game.  On the other, I guess I did like the whole Eastern Conference vs Western Conference.  It’s got kind of a Old Timers’ Feel to it (especially when they encouraged Gabby to mimic Artem Anisimov’s “shoot the duck” pose after scoring and a “mini-brawl” broke out, sort of).

It doesn’t count, unlike the MLB game, so that’s cool.  Yet, I have a hard time saying, hey, Gabby was MVP.  Gabby was MVP of what…crap?

And don’t get me started on the Pro Bowl.  Nobody gives a crap about it!  It’s literally just filler for the week between the Conference Championships and Super Bowl.  And that’s it.  Judging from the amount of people who actually watched it, seems like others could give a crap either.

I kind of like the week off of NHL games though.  As a fan, the break is a little welcome, so I can reflect.  But I was ready to jump because there were no sports on Sunday.  No sports!  I’d rather watch nothing than the All-Star Games or Pro Bowl or whatever shit show there is.  But that’s just me talkin’.