Henrik Lundqvist

NYR: Foursquare Mayor of The Penalty Box

I have a feeling that this start to the season, in Europe, then coming back to the Eastern Time Zone, to the West Coast of Canada, then gallivanting over the Canadian countryside, might come to haunt the Rangers at some point.  Chances are, they’ll get their act together and they’ll string along a few wins, and I guess the silver lining is that they’ll be visiting Lose-a-peg in another week, so that could be promising.

Yet, I’ve seen some things that really kind of get to me at this point, so early in the season.  The taking of stupid-ass penalties being one of those things that are like a day ending in “Y,” they happen WAY too often, especially three games into the season.  The Islanders wasted no time in capitalizing on the way-too-many five-on-threes during the game.  I have to be honest, that John Tavares…he’s a rock star.  And it’s not very lightly that I take giving an IceLander a compliment, so I covet him officially.   Ugh.

So what has stood out in this short season is that the Rangers are the Mayor of the Penalty Box when they play…in fact, I hope they keep their check-ins modified because I’d really hate for them to not get their mayor points for being residents there.  /sarcasm

This was also one of the first games I watched that John Tortorella really annoyed me.  I actually was a fan of him, even gave him a pass (whether rightful or not) because it seemed like they had a shoestring (yes, don’t get me started on “shoestringing” a big market team with a large overheard…I’ll get to Village Idiot Dolan in a minute), so I figured maybe Brad Richards would be the rug that tied the room together.

I saw him SMILING when the Rangers were just getting their asses kicked on the power play and even penalty killing.  I just think he’s severely out of touch, he knows that Jimmy Wilpon, erm, DOLAN, and Glen Sather holds onto their “guys” for way too long.  Meaning, they don’t like admitting to their mistakes.   Torts though seems to be losing the team.  Really, it’s pathetic, when I know someone like Mike Keenan (back in the day) and Roger Neilson would have had those guys doing pushups for the stupid ass trips to the penalty box, in multiple games this year…and we’re only THREE GAMES IN!!!

Then there was the questionable move of taking Henrik Lundqvist out with almost TWO MINUTES left in the game.  Uh, why?  I get the empty net situation, it was sort of necessary…but I guess I would rather have our guy manning the net till about a minute left in the game, especially with the way Tavares was all over the zone like white on rice.  I mean, was Torts even WATCHING the same game I was??

Then there’s the question of the schedule.  I was at Game Four of the first round last year, and MSG was going through some construction then.  It was hellish getting around and walking in the concourses there.  It was hot as Hell there, and you couldn’t maneuver there as well.  I thought it was a combo of it being a high-ticket game, and the construction.  I was also sick with a head cold, and it just wasn’t pleasant.  So being that the Garden is still under construction, I had to wonder if this several games on the road is to help with the construction.

Now, I get that MSG needed a makeover, I know Dolan gets what Dolan wants…but it’s asinine that a majority of this couldn’t have happened in the offseason of both the Rangers and the Knicks.  I think a lot more could be done or at least, do it in small portions.  See, when you do a gut renovation, you start small, so that you can inhabit parts of it and have minor inconveniences here and there.  Clearly, Jim Dolan has no clue.  But what else is old?  If the renovation of the Garden is causing the delay of the Rangers season, trust me, it will come back to haunt them.  You heard it here first.

In the meantime, I hope the team has their Foursquare account current.  After all, with all the traveling, border crossing, and restaurants in the locales, they’ll be earning some serious points till they return to New York.

PS I also thought I would have a chance to go to this game…20/20 hindsight, I’m glad that I didn’t.  But I have to admit it was kinda cool to see the bells-and-whistles for the Islanders goals…and then basically 85% of the arena going nuts whenever the Rangers scored.  I must go to a game at the Mausoleum one of these days.

Rangers Play Like Swedish Chef Cooks

See the resemblance between Henke and the Swedish Chef?

No? Well, they both have similar facial hair.  The resemblance was more of how the Rangers played in Sweden, and how the Swedish Chef cooks.  Disorganized, disjointed, a bit haphazard.

I suppose starting a year 0-0-2 could be much worse.  I hate those goddamn shootouts.  And OT games need not apply in the first two games of the season. Just sayin’.

Few things: I watched only Friday’s game, since I was away from home most of Saturday afternoon.  I followed the game closely on Friday, since I watched it, and Saturday I followed on Twitter.  It was funny listening to Sam Rosen calling the game for Rangers on Friday, as every time he stumbled over Mike Richards from the LA Kings’ name,  like he wanted to say “RICH-ter.”  Saturday, I heard that Bradley Richards scored his first goal.  Welcome to New York!  Or rather, Stockholm.

It just sucks though because I think the Rangers just aren’t used to a guy who not only knows how to score but can set it up too.  What a novel thought. It’s almost as if they weren’t prepared though they’ve been practicing with him for quite some time.  It’s like – holy crap, we’re no longer Smurfs On Ice!

Like, the whole la-la-la look-at-me I’m-so-pretty thing is no longer applicable.  Except it kinda is, cause if they’re not prepared for a shooter-and-doer like Richards, then we’re in bigger trouble than we thought.

But fear not, Ranger fans, we’ve got this one.  So we drop two in Sweden to start the season, big deal.  Though it was kind of a big deal for the homecoming for King Henrik or “Henke” as they call him in his homeland.

So how appropriate that the Swedish Chef throws shit around in his kitchen, and the Rangers threw shit around during their games in Sweden?  They must have thought he was saying “Bourque Bourque Bourque,” like it was code for something for Ryan Bourque, rather than “Bork Bork Bork,” like his usual tune.

Ah well.  Get back to the states boys, I miss you. Bork Bork Bork indeed.

If Grandma Had Balls…

I famously turned down a business trip because of baseball season.  I got married to as big of a baseball (and Mets) fan as I am (he’s probably a bigger one though).  It’s probably an understatement to say that I am a big sports fan.

One of the big tests of a fan is each pre-season of any sport they follow.  For me, it happens three times per year — in the late summer (football), in the early fall (hockey) and of course the late winter/early spring (baseball).  And a tried and true fan goes through the hopefulness, reality and high hopes each of those times, and that’s prediction time.

On my podcast, the Kult of Mets Personalities, we went through the motions of doing predictions for the Mets.  Most of us said they would be a .500 team (they are below, right now, with nine games to finish), one of my other co-podcasters kept saying “NINETY WINS!”  Yeah, right.  But it goes to show what our feelings were, where reality crept in and somewhere in between.

So now, the predictions are filtering in for hockey teams, including mine, the New York Rangers.

To be honest, I have no idea where to lump this team.  In 2010-11, there’s a reason why Henrik Lundqvist was the league leader in shutouts…he couldn’t afford to give up any goals per game.  Because they didn’t have a “sniper,” as my dad would call that missing link to the Rangers being a more successful team.

The Rangers also have 7th & 8th Avenues littered with bad contracts and players who came to the team only to never quite live to their potential.  Wade Redden?  Eric Lindros? (On that note: ugh).  This year, we are expecting a lot from two players: Brad Richards and Marian Gaborik.  Gaborik was brought in to be “that guy” and had a clear drop-off recently.  As for Richards, I am not sure what to expect from him specifically.  He has BUST written all over him given my history of rooting for this team, but I decided he’s the player I am giving the benefit of the doubt to in 2011-12.  My dad even said to me that he’s a nice addition – big ass guy standing at goal crease.

And I wonder where I get it from.

Hey, all I’m looking for is for them not to figure skate when they need to start shooting.  “Smurfs on Ice” is this phenomenon which I’ve coined with my husband, when the Rangers tend to dance around and look pretty and not looking to spare Henrik from having to stand on his head to make plays.

As for predictions…well, I was inspired by a preview over at Ranger Nation, a very definitive Rangers site.  They profile TSN’s 30 teams in 30 days predictions and sum it up with “If the Rangers fire on all cylinders, they could dominate in the East and even win the Atlantic Division.”

Isn’t that akin to saying, “If Grandma had balls, she’d be Grandpa?”

I hate to sound so cynical.  Each year, I have a high expectation level for this team, and it never truly comes to fruition or they fall short.  I had the misfortune of going to the playoffs last year, which they promptly were out in first round.  I wasn’t expecting Stanley Cup of course…but I certainly would have liked to see more fight.  So this year, I’m supposed to think it’s all different.

Look, I’m gonna be as hopeful as I can.  But I think predictions are funny.

New York Manscapers

Henrik Lundqvist didn’t just have me at “I am from Sveeden, ya?” but when he mentioned in Time Out New York this week that he wore suits four-five days a week.

*SWOON*

Much of it is an occupational thing — after all, he plays hockey that much per week, and wears suits as he travels with the team. Plus, I had the opportunity to get some photos of him at the Manhattan Center for a Rangers subscriber event and I think it was either Brandon Prust or Brian Boyle who said, “The invite said ‘business casual’ and Henrik looks like he’s going to the Prom!”

Sean Avery is clearly a goon on the ice, but he’s well-known in fashion circles, and even interned at Vogue for a time.  I’m one of the few Rangers fans who actually loves Avery.  I also like that he’s been outspoken against bullying and for marriage equality.  Sports guys are supposed to be seen as “tough guys,” and though there’s no question about Avery being one, I admire that he’s so passionate about these things, stuff no sports guys ever were to talk about.

Oh and Brad Richards, our new guy?  Made an appearance at Fashion Week

More eye candy for the ladies came in the form of Mark Sanchez’s spread in GQ.  Damn, he looks good in green, doesn’t he???  The cover story said “Thank God It’s Football Season.”  All I could think is…let’s thank her for Mark Sanchez!!

Make no mistake: I am a sports chick, and I love attending games and watching them on TV…Hell, my husband and I might get divorced this weekend because I am pulling rank to watch the Jets game over the Mets game (on at the same time, thanks for the TV geniuses who didn’t consult with MY schedule).

That doesn’t mean, I can’t appreciate a good looking man, especially one in uniform.